Black Friday Horror Stories

For some, camping out all night outside a store has become a Black Friday tradition. But no one could expect these outrageous Black Friday horror stories...

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“That’s How I Lost an Arm”

“I lost an arm,” begins a Black Friday horror story on Reddit. Thankfully, it’s not what you think!

“This was in 2009. My friends and I had camped outside of a corporate store in anticipation of a big sale on some new LCD televisions. Anyway, after the doors opened and all of us rushed into the store, my eye caught a glimpse of an old childhood relic that would be perfect for my son (he was five at the time). It was a Stretch Armstrong.

“Long story short, I grabbed the last Stretch Armstrong on the shelf at the same time as another customer. A struggle ensued, and by the end of it, I came out the victor. Unfortunately, I noticed a puddle of corn syrup on the floor. [There is corn syrup inside Stretch Armstrong toys!] What happened is Stretch’s left arm came off. It was gone. The other customer left it in the aisle and made his way off. He didn’t even look back. That’s how I lost an arm.”

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“I’ve Thrown One Punch in My Life. It Was on Black Friday”

That’s the first line of one Reddit user’s addition to the worst Black Friday horror stories.

“So it was the year the 360 came out. I was standing in line to get some external hard drive next to the video games. And there was this 11ish year old kid with a woman in her 60s. He was waiting for his 360 bundle. Woman before him had ‘gotten the last one.’ Sighs all around. Then he says ‘nope one more’ and begins the motion of handing it to the kid and this guy comes out of no where and pushed the older woman and the kid.

“The kid hit his face on the edge of a video game rack, you know the one with the metal and plastic dividers. At 19 years old I don’t know what came over me but I instantly swung for the dude’s head and caught him right in the temple.

“Everyone froze, including me. Guy had dropped the 360 and got up and walked away. I slid it with my foot to the kid and he didn’t say anything either.”

These good news stories will help restore your faith in humanity.

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“I Didn’t Have to Get a Divorce”

Of all the Black Friday horror stories, one of the saddest is perhaps a loving husband trying to snag a deal for his wife, only to be accused of cheating. That’s exactly what happened to one Reddit user who came to the conclusion that Black Friday is not a challenge he’s willing to take ever again.

“My wife needed a new laptop. She went to bed hours before and was sound asleep. I got this idea to go to Best Buy, get in the door and get her one of the laptop deals for super cheap.

“When I got there it was not what I expected. It looked like a Grateful Dead concert. There were people everywhere doing all sorts of things. Selling pizza from school buses, bonfires in grills, pup tents, camp sites, police lights, sirens, fights, screaming and all kinds of commotion. It was like a concert.

“The doors open. About 30 minutes later I get in the door. Home free! I’m going to be the hero! All while my wife is asleep and clueless. I make my way to the computer section. It was so crowded it took me about 15 minutes to get to the computer section. Home free, I find a massive debacle. People are screaming, scrambling and chaos everywhere. I was confused standing there.

“I tried, but I realized from the fruitless attempts I was not getting any deal, or any help to make any purchase at all.

“Humbled, I finally get to the road and make my way back home. I get home and walk in the door early in the morning. My wife had woken, found me missing and was pacing the floor when I walked in. She was pissed. I don’t recall what time I made it back in the house, but my trek took me several hours and the sun was up. I was gone the entire night in her eyes and she wanted an explanation. To her it looked like I was out cheating on her. When does a man go out all night and get caught sneaking in early in the morning. I had no laptop and only my story above as an explanation.

“Eventually she believed me. I didn’t have to get a divorce and I learned that day Black Friday is a nightmare.”

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pathdoc/shutterstock

“A Geriatric Version of Roller Derby Without the Skates”

A Reddit user working on Black Friday found himself witnessing a fight he would have never imagined, both because of the people involved as well as the item it was over!

“I worked at RadioShack for a year in college. During Black Friday, one of the sale items was a $10 calculator marked down to $5. Two sweet, elderly women came in to the store looking for them. When I told them there was only one left in the display, the sh*t was ON.

“It turned into a geriatric version of roller derby without the skates. The one grandma who lost the race called the other one a ‘f*%*ing b*%ch’ as she was standing in the checkout line, gripping her $5 prize. If you want to avoid the chaos, here is how to stretch your budget.

“I always imagined some little kid opening presents on Christmas morning and getting this stupid $5 calculator, not really wanting it and having no clue about the back story behind it, as his grandma, sipping her tea, looks on with a triumphant gleam in her eye.”

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“My Face Was Smooshed Against the Glass and I Could Barely Breathe”

One Reddit user is still upset about a Black Friday that went terribly wrong years ago, and he has his dad to blame!

“I was about 10 and it was my first Black Friday. I remember this like it was yesterday because it felt like a war zone. This incident may actually be a partial reason for my PTSD. It was like slow motion, all of it.

“My dad, who is totally anti Black Friday, decided to take me to get a Furby. A Furby that I didn’t even want. I think he wanted it for himself. I only went to the mall with him out of sheer, morbid curiosity.

“He pushed and nudged his way up to the front while I was being dragged behind. We get to the doors…how we even got up there, let alone together, was a miracle. My face was smooshed against the glass and I could barely breathe. They opened the doors…I got punched in the face by some mother with some little boy younger than me. I am not sure she intended to actually punch me, but she did. Maybe she did intend to punch me, but she was getting jostled around pretty good too.

“As I was starting to get trampled by other people behind me, I hear the kid give me a Simpson’s Nelson laugh, ‘Ha, ha!’ and he got trampled shortly after. I had been separated from my dad at this point. I laid on the ground like a lion in a wildebeest stampede waiting to find the weakest one to pounce. I finally found him in the Furby aisle pulling some NFL type Furby stripping skills on some teenager. He said, ‘You’re too old for a Furby!'”

Although the dad in this story eventually won the Furby, he ultimately tried to “kill” it with his van because it wouldn’t shut up. “My dad ran it over with the van. A few times. It didn’t want to die. My dad told me I was never allowed to have a Furby again because he thought it was possessed.”

Not all toys lose their value—as a matter of fact, these childhood toys are worth thousands.

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“Fists Were Thrown and There Was Some Blood”

Unfortunately, Black Friday horror stories often involve physical destruction, and that’s exactly what one Reddit user witnessed.

“Back in my poor college days when I worked at Walmart we had a fight break out over a bike. Fists were thrown and there was some blood. Eventually one guy got a hold of it and managed to get away from the crowd, he rode the bike out of the store to flee his pursuers (without paying).”

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“That Guy’s Thanksgiving Was a Bust for Sure”

Can you imagine being the first in line for a Black Friday sale, sleeping outside the store for three days, only to lose out on the one thing you came for? Me neither! One Reddit user tells a grim story:

“I think it was around Black Friday 2004 and I was a cart pusher at a Walmart. In this particular year, Walmart offered a plasma TV at an extremely low price and was the hottest deal of the year. A man showed up the Tuesday before the big sale with a tent, ice coolers, generator, TV and everything he needed to brave the three nights he would be staying over. He continuously talked about being first in line and how he was going to get the plasma TV and how he was hosting the next Super Bowl party so this was just going to be the best thing ever.

“Come around Thursday night, I showed up to my shift and he was still there in a jolly mood thankful he was about to be able to go home and sleep in his own bed. The news came and he did a short interview and explained what he was waiting for, how he was able to get the time off (he was a truck driver) and was overall excited over the whole ordeal and prided himself for toughing out the cold.

“The line for the entrance wrapped around the whole front of the door and about another 300 yards or so past the store with thousands of people waiting to get in. At 5:00 am, the doors opened and the man goes straight to the plasma TVs to see that they were all gone. What happened? The garden center at the Walmart opened up about 10 seconds before the front doors and those that came the night before scooped up all 15 plasma TVs. This guy who had been there since Tuesday afternoon was dumbfounded and argued with management but was stonewalled and told there was nothing that can be done. That guy’s Thanksgiving was a bust for sure.”

These real life drive thru worker stories will leave you shaking your head.

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“Her Pen Went Straight Into Her Neck”

“Walmart story time,” begins a Reddit user. “A couple years ago when the sale started there was a surge of people trying to get their stuff. One lady got knocked down and her pen went straight into her neck thankfully missing the jugular. The f*%$ed up part is no one tried to help, they just walked over her to get their deal items.

“An associate that saw it happen had to stand over the top over her to protect her from getting trampled. When the ambulance crew arrived they had to literally shove people out of the way because no one would move.” After hearing stories like that you may want to consider some alternatives to Black Friday shopping.

Read more outrageous news stories from around the globe.

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“I Fell Right On It and Sliced My Hand Open”

Black Friday horror stories tend to come with the territory when working at Walmart on the infamous day. One Reddit user found that out the hard way.

“My first Black Friday, I was working at a Walmart. I was assigned to be one of the employees that would cut open the plastic on the pallets which contained our merchandise, which were all on the floor. Basically, as I readied the box cutter, I got shoved by a customer and I fell right on it and sliced my hand open. After getting through that and patching it up, I came out on the floor and promptly got punched in the face when I picked up a DVD on the ground. A customer apparently wanted it.”

Think that sounds crazy? Check out the most ridiculous fast food lawsuits of all time.

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“The Women Went INSANE and Elbowed Her in the Face”

“I worked one Black Friday in the clothes dept at Walmart. For like 2 straight hours before the sale began, people hovered over the pallets. The alarm went off and the swarm just went insane,” says a Reddit user.

“There were two women in particular on opposite sides, tossing clothes back and forth to each other. I don’t know what their system was because half the stuff they were just catching and tossing aside. But this little teenager (I mean like petite tiny girl) intercepted a pair of jeans being tossed and the women went INSANE and elbowed her in the face. Instant blood. The little girl was so shocked she just stood there shaking and crying. The woman acted like that was a perfectly reasonable thing to do. I pulled her out of the crowd and started to walk her to get her cleaned up when the sheriff appeared out of nowhere. The best part was she was his kid and the woman was arrested on the spot. Hahaha. She had to post bail AND pay full price for her Levi’s.”

Next, check out this roundup of the worst travel nightmares of 2019.

The Family Handyman
Originally Published on The Family Handyman

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