20+ Funniest Quotes from Kim’s Convenience
Updated: Jan. 18, 2022
The CBC comedy based on Ins Choi’s award-winning play has resonated with viewers for its heartfelt representation of Asian-Canadian stories over five seasons. Here are 20+ of the funniest moments from Kim’s Convenience that’ll make you laugh all over again.
Appa on gossiping:
“Stop! Every time you gossip, you make the baby Jesus cry.” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Thinkin’ ‘Bout Inkin’”
Umma on hard choices:
“I want our family together but I also want a working dishwasher.” – Umma, Kim’s Convenience, Season 3, “New Appa-liance”
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Mr. Mehta on the weather:
“The weather! My God! It’s…everywhere.” – Mr. Mehta, Kim’s Convenience, Season 3, “Cutie Pie”
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Mr. Chin on martial arts superstars:
“Holy s***, Mr. Kim, you is Bruce Lee and Jet Li all rolled into one plump Korean!” – Mr. Chin, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Hapkido”
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Jung on budgeting:
“Why pay for stuff when other people can, right?” – Jung, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “New TV”
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Appa on a balanced diet:
“Come. We eat from our sad food group starting with cookie dough ice cream.” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Janet’s Boyfriend”
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Gerald on hospitality:
“I even topped up the waterbed so it’s ready for your snooze cruise. Your only ports of call will be Dreamville and Slumber City.” – Gerald, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Cardboard Jung”
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Shannon on yogurt-stealing etiquette:
“But seriously, if you’re going to steal someone’s yogurt, eat the whole thing. Don’t just tunnel down to the fruit then leave it.” – Shannon, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Rude Kid”
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Kimchee on drinkable cheese:
“You’ve obviously never tried Velveeta. That’s a sippin’ cheese.” – Kimchee, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Appa’s First Text”
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Appa on the art of the sneak attack:
“Mrs. Kim is very smart sneak attack. Almost best. Almost…” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Service”
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Mr. Mehta on going to the movies:
“Raj is taking me to a full-price movie. He won’t even let me sneak in our snacks. We will be purchasing them. Again, full price. The mind boggles.” – Mr. Mehta, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Janet’s Boyfriend”
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Appa on questionable snacks:
“I put in my mouth apple cut with the blood and the garbage of murder knife?” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Knife Strife”
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Umma on after-Appa plans:
“After mourning period, I move into fancy condo and upgrade to Sleep Number Bed.” – Umma, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Bon Voyage”
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Shannon on singing like nobody’s watching:
“I’m closing up the store and I’m crushin’ it. Finished up the payroll and I’m crushin’ it. Probably should go home, I’m not rushin’ it. And I’m gonna get some wine, I’m lushin’ it.” – Shannon, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Handyman”
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Appa on making the right impression:
“In my funeral photo, I want to be looking successful.” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Ddong Chim”
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Gerald on childhood memories:
“The coolest thing my dad ever let me do was smoke one of his cigarettes. I was five, so it’s less cool and more negligent.” – Gerald, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Beacon of Truth”
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Umma on facial hair:
“You don’t like his beard? This is a miracle. Most Korean men, they cannot grow beard. But this land is fertile.” – Umma, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Wingman”
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Janet on double standards:
“’Cool Christian Korean boy.’ That’s all I’ve heard my entire life. And she was engaged to a white guy.” – Janet, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Handyman”
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Chelsea on breakups:
“I’m not friends with any exes. When a relationship is done, that person is dead to me. I burn everything they gave me and erase them from my life.” – Chelsea, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Thinkin’ ‘Bout Inkin’”
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Terence on the sanctity of puzzles:
“It’s just funny, how we don’t eat each other’s lunches but we think we can do each other’s puzzles.” – Terence, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “In the Bedroom”
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Jung on turning a negative to a positive:
“Your hate just makes me more beautiful.” – Jung, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Cardboard Jung”
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